Caring Touch as a Way to Communicate

A crying baby elicits a predictable response from its parents or grandparents. An adult swoops in, lifts the baby in their arms, and snuggles, cradles, maybe even rocks the baby as the cries diminish, their breathing settles, the baby calms. As babies become children and even young adults, soothing and reassurance comes by way of hugs, pats on the back, a quick shoulder rub, or a hand laid on a forearm. These seemingly simple touches have enormous effects because they are hard-wired in human development. It should not be surprising then, that physical contact is a vital tool for those caring for loved ones with Dementia.

No matter one’s age, human touch enhances communication by expressing emotion and offering reassurance. In a scientific study, a “sender” was asked to convey a range of emotions - happiness, sadness, surprise, disgust, anger, fear, etc. – by touching the “receiver’s” forearm from behind a curtain. Receivers were able to accurately identify the emotion 48 - 83% of the time(1). No words spoken, no facial expressions visible – only variations in touch!

As a caregiver, the suggestion “Let’s get ready to go” may be easier to accomplish if accompanied by a warm hand on a shoulder. A gentle touch by a caregiver can improve compliance with requests, and offer reassurance when fear or concern is detected. Human touch increases the feeling of wellbeing by decreasing cortisol levels (the "stress“ hormone) and increasing oxytocin levels (the “love” hormone). If our goal is to care, comfort, and protect our loved ones with Dementia, the power of simple touch cannot be ignored.

From simple to professional, therapeutic massage intensifies the benefits of simple touch and introduces several more. Regular therapeutic massage lessens physical pain, decreases the physical symptoms of stress, reduces depression symptoms, improves immune function, and enhances attentiveness1. Because of these benefits, therapeutic massage should be on the menu of options for a loved one living with Dementia.

Lastly, we must not overlook the value of social interaction and connectedness delivered by a caring human touch. Humans are, after all, social animals. No matter the advances in technology, it is clear that when human touch is withheld, a void remains that cannot easily be filled with spoken words or digital screens.  

Note 1: Field, Tiffany. 2011. Developmental Review. (30) 2010 367-383. Touch for socioemotional and physical wellbeing: A review.    Accessed May 29, 2020, from https://www.radboudcentrumvoormindfulness.nl/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/artikel-4.pdf

Contributor:  Karen Ogden, DSA Team Member

The opinions expressed by contributing authors are not necessarily the opinions of the Dementia Society, Inc. We do not endorse nor guarantee products, comments, suggestions, links, or other forms of content contained within blog posts that have been provided to us with permission, or otherwise. Dementia Society does not provide medical advice. Please consult your doctor. www.DementiaSociety.org

How to Keep Communicating

Dementia is a set of conditions, which can be caused by a variety of known neurodegenerative diseases*, and some still-yet-unknown triggers, which progress over time, and will likely affect a person's ability to remember and understand basic facts, such as names, dates, and places. Aside from that, it may gradually affect the way a person communicates as well. His or her ability to present rational ideas and to reason clearly could change, and it is up to those surrounding their affected loved one to modify their ways of communication to reach out and still have a connection.

If you are a caregiver to a person with Dementia, you may find that as the illness progresses, you'll have to start discussions to get the person to make conversation. This is common. The person’s ability to process information gets progressively weaker and responses can become delayed.

Encouraging someone with Dementia to communicate

Try to start conversations with the person you're looking after, especially if you notice that the person with Dementia is starting fewer conversations on his or her own.

Ways to encourage communication include:

• Speaking clearly and slowly, using short sentences.
• Making eye contact with the person when talking, asking questions or having other conversations.
• Giving the person time to respond, because he or she may feel pressured if you try to speed up answers.
• Encouraging the person to join in conversations with others, where possible.
• Letting them speak for themselves during discussions about their welfare or health issues, as they may not speak up for themselves in other situations.
• Do not patronize, or ridiculing what he or she says.
• Acknowledging what is said, even if your question has not been answered, or what is said seems out of context – show that you've heard the person and encourage the person with Dementia to say more.
• Giving the person simple choices when conversing.
• Using other ways to communicate – such as rephrasing questions because the affected person can't answer in the way he or she used to.

Communicating through body language and physical contact

Communication isn't just talking. Gestures, movement, and facial expressions can all convey meaning or help you get a message across. Body language and physical contact become significant when speech is difficult for a person with Dementia.

Communicating when someone has difficulty speaking or understanding can be made easier by:

• Being patient and remaining calm, which can help the person with Dementia communicate more easily.
• Keeping the tone of voice positive and friendly, where possible.
• Talking to the person at a respectful distance to avoid intimidation – being at the same level or lower can also help.
• Patting or holding the person’s hand can provide reassurance and make you feel closer, but watch the person’s body language to make sure the person with Dementia is comfortable with you doing this.

Listening to and understanding someone with Dementia

Communication is a two-way process. As a caregiver of someone with Dementia, you will probably have to learn to “listen” more carefully. You may need to be more aware of non-verbal messages, such as facial expressions and body language. You may have to use more physical contact, such as reassuring pats on the arm, or smiles, as well as speaking.

When communicating with someone with Dementia, “active listening” skills can help. These include:

• Using eye contact to look at the person, and encouraging that person to look back at you.
• Trying not to interrupt the affected person, even if you think you know what that person is saying.
• Stopping what you’re doing so you can give the person your full attention while he or she is speaking.
• Minimizing distractions that may get in the way of communication, such as the TV or radio playing too loudly.
• Repeating what you heard back to the person and asking if it’s accurate.
• “Listening” in a different way – shaking your head, turning away or murmuring are alternative ways of saying no or expressing disapproval.

It’s important to encourage the person with Dementia to communicate wants and needs – however, he or she can. Remember, we all find it frustrating when we can’t communicate effectively, or are misunderstood.

*More common diseases which have been identified: Alzheimer's, Vascular Dementia, Lewy Body Dementia, Frontotemporal Dementia, Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy, among many others.

Source: This article was provided by the UK National Health Service (NHS), revised in December 2017. All rights reserved.

The opinions expressed by contributing authors are not necessarily the opinions of the Dementia Society, Inc. We do not endorse nor guarantee products, comments, suggestions, links, or other forms of the content contained within blog posts that have been provided to us with permission, or otherwise. Dementia Society of America does not provide medical advice. Please consult your doctor.